Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Dirty Little Secret

I've been reading a bunch of PostSecret postcards today and thinking about what I would make one of. Right now, I can think of a few possible secrets.

"I feel that if you can't love me, no one ever will. Thanks for that, Dad..."

"I'm afraid that I will always love you, and you will never reciprocate again."

"I fear/hope that we are soulmates."

"I want to tell you that I'm moving to become a stripper, but I'm afraid you'll abandon me because of it."

If I create cards out of these, I'll post them here.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

This House Is Not A Home

So my father finally hit the fan, and we had to call the cops.

My brother and I were expecting this, but we always thought it would be our mom. Life’s funny that way…

He came home and immediately started screaming at us. My brother had just woken up, and I was taking a nap before starting on homework. They were screaming at each other, and I pulled the covers over my head and prayed it would stop. When my mom texted me, I told her they were fighting and to come get my brother.

Then, my dad burst into my room and yanked the blankets off my bed, calling me ungrateful, lazy, and pathetic. He laid into me about everything that was apparently bothering him about me, while I curled into a ball on my bed and tried to go someplace else. When he began punctuating everything he said by slapping his hand, my brother thought he was hitting me and got in his face to stop it.

My father then proceeded to grab my brother by the throat and pin him to his bed. Luckily, at this point my mom showed up and things never escalated between us and him any further. The parents screamed at each other for a few minutes, and when my father slammed the door in Mom’s face and dared her to call the police, she did. My brother stood outside with her while I cowered behind my bed and they texted me to join them. I did when the police finally showed up.

The police talked to us, and we tried to downplay it. I think because we were in shock…

They then went inside and talked to him. They said that we were free to go if we wanted, and should maybe listen to our father more. Why they reacted this way rather than arresting him, which is what they’re supposed to do in domestic disturbance cases, I can only guess.

My brother left with mom, and I stayed at the house. The van I drive is legally his and being in shock I didn’t think through that I could use my mom’s car the next day.

I then proceeded to get insanely high on hydrocodone, so much so that I couldn’t walk, and try to sleep. I failed at the later because every time I heard a noise I jumped out of bed.

After work the next day I just went straight to my mom’s.

Thank god for my best friend, he went back with me on Monday to speed-pack while my father was at work.

I don’t know what I’d do without that boy…