Sunday, May 30, 2010

In the End the Obvious is Everything

So other than my adolescent whining about tragic love, what has been new with me?

I have decided to stay in Kitsap, for a chance with him. Stupid and foolhardy? Probably. But I know I would regret it if I left. I'm getting my Associates in Anthropology, then seeing where things go.

Currently I'm looking for a place to live and for a job, as where I was working went out of business.

Until then, I'm broke and essentially homeless as my mom is moving to Portland mid-June. Luckily I made up with my dad sorta, so he's helping me a lot.

Been sticking to just weed in terms of harder substances, but smoking cigarettes more. Those have to stop soon because I'm going to go on progesterone pills and the combination can cause blood clots.

In terms of friends, I've been making some! It's quite exciting, having people to hang out with on a regular basis. They seem like wonderful people, and I sincerely hope these friendships are for real.

Other news, my mom has made an appointment for me to get screened for low spectrum autism. Which all things considered, would make sense. But we'll see on that.

Until next time,

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Grey's Anatomy Taught Me Something

That I don't want 50 years to go by and realize at the end of it that I let the love of my life slip away. I want those 50 years with him. The reasons we didn't work, those aren't reasons any more. We've grown, matured. He treats me better every day, and when I look at him I fall more in love with him.

He's in love with me, but he hasn't felt "the moment" that makes him want to truly be with me. I wish I knew what exactly he was missing.

As petty as these worries seem, to have the one man you've ever loved so close, but at the same time so very far away, hurts.

Other updates, I'm staying here, getting my AA in anthropology. Then I'll see how it goes. I talked to my dad today, and he's going to try to help me live out on my own. At long last. Hopefully things improve...

Oh, and I'm out of a job. The cafe went out of business. Which sucks, because jobs are impossible to find. Like I said, hopefully things improve.